Overview
What is domestic violence?
If you want to save this information but don't think it is safe to take it home, see if a trusted friend can keep it for you. Plan ahead. Know who you can call for help, and memorize the phone number. Be careful online too. Your online activity may be seen by others. Do not use your personal computer or device to read about this topic. Use a safe computer, such as one at work, a friend's home, or a library.
Domestic violence is abuse that happens in a personal relationship. When domestic violence occurs between a former or current partner or spouse, it is called intimate partner violence.
Most relationships have difficult times, and almost every couple argues now and then. But intimate partner violence is different from common marital or relationship problems. It is a pattern of abuse that a partner may use to control the behavior of another.
In some relationships both partners abuse each other. One partner may be more abusive, or the abuse may be equal.
Abuse affects people of every gender, ethnicity, race, age, sexual orientation, social status, and religion.
The abuser may use fear, bullying, and threats to gain power and control over the other person. The abuser may act jealous, controlling, or possessive. These early signs of abuse may happen soon after the start of the relationship and might be hard to notice at first.
After the relationship becomes more serious, the abuse may get worse.
- The abuser may begin making threats, calling the other person names, and slamming doors or breaking dishes. This is a form of emotional abuse that is sometimes used to make the person feel bad or weak.
- Physical abuse that starts with a slap might lead to kicking, shoving, and choking over time.
- As a way to control the person, the abuser may make violent threats against the person's children, other family members, or pets.
- Abusers may also control or withhold money to make the person feel weak and dependent. This is called financial abuse.
- Domestic violence also includes sexual abuse, such as forcing a person to have sex against their will.
What can you do if you're being abused?
It's important to get help. Talk with someone you trust, such as a friend or your doctor. Or get help from a center for victims of domestic violence. Talking with someone can help you make the changes you need.
You can get help by contacting a local advocacy group for support, information, and advice on how to stay safe. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (1-800-799-7233 ) for the nearest program. The hotline is available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, in English, Spanish, and other languages.
You can also see the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence website at https://ncadv.org/resources to find programs that offer shelter and legal support.
Here are some other things you can do:
- Know your legal rights. Consider asking the police for help.
- Make sure that you know phone numbers you can call and places you can go in an emergency.
- Teach your children ways to stay safe when there is violence in the home.
